Dharma Talk

The moment you step outside, is the moment you never go home again. - Caroline Myss

been here

Part of Astronaut Karen Nyberg's photo of Typhoon Haiyan.  The red dot represents where I was. If the view from the ground was the same as the view from outer space, it would probably have been scarier.
Sorry, I have no trophy photos to share. But I'm ready to go back to blogging.  -hadv, 3/31/14


Test posting from email. Does it really work?

power to the introverts

If you consider yourself an introvert, Laurie Helgoe's Introvert Power, is a good read. It's empowering to know that you make up 57% of the population, that you are not society's deviant, that you're not a sociopath (antisocial), nor a loser. In extrovert societies (as opposed to Norden or Japan which are considered introvert cultures), ALL children are raised to socialize, to go out with friends, be with people and be "normal".  Introvert children learn to socialize, but they grow up seeking a belongingness in groups which they never find. They can't find that belongingness because they are seeking it outside themselves.  An introvert's true preference is solitude. The only belongingness he/she will feel is with nature, or with oneself.  Never with people.

This book has released me from all these misconceptions I have about being an introvert. Although I have always enjoyed my solitude and never cared what people think about what I do and how I prefer to spend my time, there is always that part of me that seeks validation from outside myself. Which even when I get it, is never satisfying. There's also the anxiety about "maybe not being normal" when I do activities that are truer to my nature like waking up early in the morning and sitting by the beach watching the sun break out from the horizon. Or seeking to belong in groups, noisy groups at that, which can be very frustrating, unfulfilling and draining.


The past few months I've been away, I've been practicing giving people their psychic space. It's about giving the other person the space to be themselves, to act and react their own way, to grow at their own pace, to realize ideas and lessons through their own processing, to feel their own emotions. To respect their emotional reactions to situations, and not telling them, never telling them off about what should or shouldn't be. It's a difficult practice because our normal reaction would be to fit a behavior to a norm, and judge it when it deviates.


The important lesson here (book and practice) is to understand that each individual has his/her own true nature to follow. And that our only role is to realize our OWN true nature, follow it, and gain power from it.


where to go from here

I've been out of the blogging scene for months now that I don't anymore know what to write. In fact, I'm wondering if I can still write. Especially as I have no idea what to write about. I started this blog when I started my Buddhist practice (pre-2009 posts came from my previous blogs which I imported here). And did I have a lot to say and comment and judge then.  I noticed though that as my practice progressed, the less there was to say. My desire to explain and to be understood lessened.  My knowledge of things also dwindled until I didn't know anything anymore. Which ultimately left me nothing to write about.

But oh boy, when I really think about it, do I know more now than I did before. Which if asked what they are, I can only answer with a big "I don't know what I know! I just know!" Which just gave me a light bulb idea right now. I will have to think hard what it is that I do know, and write them here. So, there's my new topic for my blog. I knew I'd come up with something if I just start writing.